The most serious, and exciting, of conversations

When Dave and I got married just 2 1/2 short years ago, during the ceremony, our Justice of the Peace told the most incredible story about a rose. How a rose signified so many things and how it can be used in the greatest and worst of times to bring a couple together when it’s most needed. If you have something really important to talk to your spouse about, leave a single rose in a special place. Somewhere where your love will find it, and know, that a discussion needs to be started. It can be about a fight, about a worry, or just to say you love them.

I left Dave a rose yesterday. I left it right on his folded clothes to see immediately after he got out of the shower after work. I was so nervous of his expression when he walked in. I knew the first thing that would come to his head was dread. What could I possibly need to tell him.

Home-made, from the heart, and way cheaper than the real deal

As he walked out of the bathroom holding the rose he said, “what’s this?” “We need to talk,” I responded. “Oh no.”

“Seems your super sperm is super again.”

This time the rose symbolized celebration. We will (hopefully) be blessed with a little brother or sister for Owen in August.

I found out yesterday after taking a test in the morning that came out negative. I didn’t lose hope, I knew it was still too early. Six hours later I got a feeling to try again. I know that feeling is just that I’m crazy and couldn’t wait the two additional days that I promised myself I would, but I gave in anyway. And after an incredibly long 3 minutes, I turned to see this:

Excitement. He was excited. But terrified, as I am. As I saw that positive on that test, I cried. I cried and smiled, then cried in terror. TWO? How can we handle two? Will we have enough money? Will I finally lose all of the patience that I have been clinging to? And, God forbid, what if something goes wrong? I feel sad for those I know who have been trying forever, who I now have to tell in a month or so that I am one of the lucky ones that can get pregnant no problem. While they are going through tests and doctors’ visits and heartache. I fear that I can’t feel happy for me, while I’m sad for them.

So many things keep going through my head. I’m still terrified, but I think as time goes on, that fear will subside and the immediate joy I felt will come through and conquer all of those fears.

Every time I think of our wedding and the significance of the rose, I manage to tear up. And I can’t even say how many guests at our wedding still talk about that part of the ceremony. This was the first time I have used that rose, I’m glad the first time was for something as precious as this new life inside me.

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About Krista

Livin the poor life with the typical american family; husband, baby, and dogs. Happy to tell it like it is, the ins and outs of being a young, hip mom can be more hilarious than one might think ;)
This entry was posted in Family, I'm Crazy, Pregnancy. Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to The most serious, and exciting, of conversations

  1. Renelle says:

    Congrats! 🙂 What a wonderful time of year to find out!

  2. mrs. joe says:

    Congratulations Krista! I’m happy you didn’t have to wait long for operation #2 to commence 🙂 I know you are more than capable of having enough love and patience for two – you will make a marvelous mommy the second time around!

  3. Pingback: Real life isn’t always an excuse | True to life

  4. roncap says:

    That is wonderful news

  5. Morgan says:

    I’m SO late on commenting, but I read it and squealed when you first posted it… CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!! I hope you’re feeling well and can’t wait for more updates. 😀

  6. I’m really late to this, but CONGRATS!!!

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