One of the truly agonizing parts of my job is having to constantly listen to the astonishingly rude people that sit immediately around me in cubeland. I can be forgiving to those in our boxed-in yet wide-open world who need to talk on the phone or discuss some work items and maybe do not notice that they can be heard far and wide. What I cannot forgive is the CONSTANT discussions of those in the group next to me. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for procrastinating and chit chat in order to get through the day. HOWEVER, what I cannot fathom is how individuals think it is acceptable to shout OVER their cube walls (while still sitting in their chair, mind you) to those around them and carry on FULL conversations. 90% of the time this is not work related, and 90% of the time it is a full out conversation, and not just one question or a comment. SERIOUSLY??? This isn’t even an instance of one person talking to the person directly next to them… no. Instead, there are times where there are conversations being yelled numerous cubes away, many times it’s between more than two co-workers.
This goes on ALL DAY around me, folks. Literally all day. How do these people get anything done if they are constantly talking (well, yelling) to each other? AND who taught them that it is acceptable to yell from cube to cube while others are attempting to get work done? It amazes me that they do not even notice that no one else in our world of half walls does this. We all politely get up from our seats and have individual conversations within the confines of our individual nooks. We also have this amazing ability to adjust our voices to a tone lower than sonic boom level in order not to completely aggravate and infuriate those around us.
There are many days that I hear these people discussing things that are so incredibly dim-witted in so many ways that I am amazed these people were able to acquire a job. There are also many times I hear them asking questions to each other and more often than not a response is given that I’m sure they have made up in order to validate their brilliance. I sit knowing the correct response to their inquiry and remain mute. Why should I give them the satisfaction of being smarter for learning one more fact, work related or not?
Recently, on the coldest day of the season thus far, one of my boisterous co-workers was asking around for anyone to tell him what gas station in town had the “fastest pump” so that he would not need to stand outside for hours filling his empty tank. This amazed me because 1.) The dumb-asses around me were actually telling him where they thought the fastest pump was, as though they had experimented around town with stop watches to certify this tidbit of information and 2.) because not one of them thought of the FULL SERVE gas station right in the center of town. The full service station that not only allows you to sit quietly in your toasty car while someone else pumps your gas, but that also carries the CHEAPEST gas in town. So, I sat smugly holding onto this information, because I, the meanest/anti-social girl here, wanted him to suffer in the cold, because I suffer here every day listening to their pointless rants.
You will all hear much more about my cubical adversaries, not only because I must spend almost 40 hours a week dealing with them, but because some of the things they say are beyond imagination. The star of most of my rants will most likely be who I refer to as “Target girl”. I am amazed on a daily basis that she can function, case-in-point, she gets her name from a story she told me when she first had her baby (who is now 9 months old) where she left her baby in her carriage in an aisle in Target while she went into another aisle to look at something because she did not want to have to maneuver the carriage and it was “only for a second”. A concerned customer yelled at her and said that is irresponsible… she couldn’t understand why. She also often tries to give me newborn advice… thank you, but no thanks.